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(Reader: Doug Duff) The Bible is Boring?

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Reader Post | By Doug Duff

For your entertainment:

So, you think the “Bible” is BORING? Well, here are just two (2) examples, given to you briefly, that, if they were in the hands of a Scriptwriter, would entail an hour-long movie.

Let’s start: Judges 3:31 “And after him was Shamgar, the son of Anath, which slew of the Philistines six hundred men with an ox goad; and he also delivered Israel.” What? One man with a stick (used to prod his oxen while plowing) k----d 600 enemy soldiers? Yep.

Here’s another one: Read the whole chapter of Judges 3. Here you’ll find a man by the name of “Chushanrishathaim.” What do you suppose a Stand-Up Comedian would do with that type of material?

And, another one (same chapter): As the story goes, this Dude named Ehud, a man of God while in captivity acted as a liaison for Israel. Read it for yourself in verses 21 through 25. Here: 21 And Ehud put forth his left hand, and took the dagger from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly; 22 And the haft also went in after the blade; and the fat closed upon the blade, so that he could no draw the dagger out of his belly; and the dirt came out. 23 Then Ehud went forth through the porch, and shut the doors of the parlour upon him, and locked them. 24 When he was gone out, his servants came; and when they saw that, behold, the doors of the parlour were locked, they said, Surely he covereth his feet in his summer chamber. 25 And they tarried till they were ashamed: and, behold, he opened not the doors of the parlour; therefore they took a key, and opened them; and, behold, their lord was fallen down dead on the earth. 26 And Ehud escaped while they tarried, and passed beyond the quarries, and escaped unto Seirath.”

O.K., here’s the scenario, Ehud took a present to the King. Then, he says, “Hey, King, I’ve got a message for you from our God. But, it’s PRIVATE, only for you to hear.” The king sent everyone away. Ehud, by slight of hand, pulls out his dagger and buries it in the king’s belly and the “dirt” came out. Can you imagine the odor (stink) of that? The whole chamber was rank with the smell of poop. Ehud wipes his hand off on the kings robe, locks the chamber doors and walks out past the guards, waving his hands, saying, “The King had to relieve himself.” And away he goes.

Boring, huh?

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Doug Duff

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